We want to live in a world where highly sensitive people are seen, heard, and respected. Where sensitives believe in their value and worth and where they can access the tools they need to step into their sensitivity with confidence and calm. We believe that high sensitivity is expansive and NOT limiting and that our trait is essential to making our world a more compassionate and caring home for all living beings. Sensitivity Rising Podcast for Highly Sensitive People Why We Fear Change As Sensitive People - Sensitivity Rising

Episode 3

Why We Fear Change

Real change always involves risk. When we don’t know what will happen next, we can start to spiral and our brain makes up stories and scenarios that can quickly turn into overwhelm and worry.

If we can’t predict the outcome it can feel too risky and can stop us from trying to make changes at all.

As sensitive people we’re not only affected by changes within our own physical, emotional and mental bodies, we also pick up on the energies and vibrations of change from other people and our environment.

So let's talk about why we fear change and how we can begin to move through the fear to make positive change.

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Tonya Rothe 0:03

Welcome to the sensitivity rising podcast where sensitive people learn how to turn down the noise, and tune into their inner guidance systems.

Welcome friends to sensitivity rising. I'm Tonya. And in our last two episodes, we've talked about the experience of change. And today, I just want to go a little bit deeper into the fear that many of us can have around change. But first, if you're a fan of the show, don't forget to click the Listen link in the show notes to subscribe for free wherever you listen. And if you're with us on YouTube, please like and subscribe. So let's talk about the fear that can come with change. And depending on where we are in life, it can feel like the world is changing so fast that we can't keep up. And other times changes can't happen fast enough when it's something that we really want. As sensitive people, the fear of change can affect us deeply because of the unique ways that we interact with the world and because of our connection to the subtleties of our environments. And we're not only affected by changes within our physical, emotional and mental bodies, but we also pick up on the energies and vibrations of change from other people. All of these flux you all of these fluctuations can make us feel like we're being pushed and pulled in different directions. And this can really cause us to feel even more stressed and overwhelmed than we already do in our daily lives. But did you know that our nervous systems are actually wired to fear change? I think this is actually really helpful to understand that this fear of change is part of our DNA, and part of our evolutionary history as human beings. I know that for me, this fact makes me feel a little less alone. And a little more comforted that when changes feel overwhelming and scary that there's actually quote nothing wrong with me for feeling that way. And no matter how advanced we believe ourselves to be as human beings, our brains are still wired for a simpler way of life. The amygdala, the part of our brain that interprets change, often views it as really as a threat, and even triggers our nervous system and releases hormones for fight or flight. So what's happening is our bodies actually physically trying to protect us from change. And as human beings, we also fear the unknown. And even with the best of plans in reality, there is no way for us to anticipate the outcome of anything, not a job or relationship or even what might happen in the next hour. For the most part, when our lives feel predictable, we usually have less anxiety and stress because we imagine that we can anticipate how things are going to unfold for us and those that we love. So when things get shaken up, when things become unpredictable, we begin to feel stressed and anxious. And also, depending on a personal history, a fear of change can be a trauma response as well. Our fear of change is often based on stories, story stories, both real and the imagined ones we tell ourselves, but also on the stories that others have told us about who they think we are, and the limitations they have imposed on us. We've been we can absorb the stories that people have told us about ourselves, we can appstore absorb them as our own story. Many times, our fears are narrated by someone. Someone else may be a parent or an authority figure, who long ago wrote a part for us to play in life. And we're still playing that part, sometimes unconsciously. Maybe, for example, your parents told you a story about how being an artist isn't a real career. Or maybe they told you you weren't talented enough to become a successful artist. So as an adult, you have an A genuine fear of chasing your dream to be an artist, even though it's all you've ever really wanted to do with your life. Sometimes we might stay in an unhealthy relationship, because we're afraid of being alone. Or when we stay in jobs that make us miserable because the bad situation we know is better than the unknown that we don't. So real change always involves a risk When we don't know what will happen next, we can start to spiral. And our brain makes up stories and scenarios that can quickly turn into overwhelm and worry. And if we can't predict the outcome, it can feel too risky. And this can stop us from trying to make changes at all.

But the reality is we experience change every moment, even though the changes might be small and very quiet. Everything, including our body, mind, and spirit is changing constantly. But it's the attachment to the unknown, and attachment to the result of the changes that can paralyze us and cause us to become fearful of taking action when we really want to. So how can we begin to let go a little bit from this attachment to the outcomes and start to release some of that fear around change? I'd invite you to think about positive changes that you've made in the past. And we've all made them, sometimes we can get so caught up in the future. And the worry that we can forget about all the small and big changes that we've made in the past that have made our lives better. Maybe take some time to think back, or you can journal or even just make a simple list of some of the changes that you've made over your life that have made a positive difference. And it's also very likely that you struggle with those changes at the time as well. But you made it through to the other side. And in some way your life is better for it. Very often, when we fear the unknown of change, we automatically go to the worst case scenarios, I know that this is something I am definitely struggle with from time to time. And depending on the change you're looking to make, sometimes a little bit of that can be valid, like changing jobs or moving to a new place. But at the same time, we also need to look at the other side of it and think about the possibilities that these changes can bring. So then some things you can ask yourself is what if it does work out? What is the best thing that can come from this change? Or how will I feel or how might my life look if this change is successful? For me, I truly believe the deeper we go into our sensitivity, and the more ways that we can find to embrace it and develop it in healthy nurturing ways. The more in tune we become with life. And also with the cycles of nature, the more in tune we become with our bodies and emotions. And the more we can do this, then the more freedom and joy we can experience. And then this connection to our authentic selves through this freedom and joy can help us to release much of the fear that we have around change. So think, think maybe of a small change you want to make, maybe you want to wake up 15 minutes earlier in the morning, so you're not so rushed. Or maybe you want to put your phone away 30 minutes before bed. And instead of thinking of it as a change, just try labeling it as an experiment, an experiment in curiosity just to see what might happen. Always putting self compassion at the heart of your experiment, trying your best to set judgment aside, and really only seeking to make progress and not perfection. There is a genuine joy that can come from embracing imperfection. And the more we start to see imperfection as our reality, to understand it as our reality of everything that we do in the world, the more fear starts to take a backseat, not just when it comes to making change, but in other areas of our life to real change. real and lasting change takes place when we're able to make conscious choices as our authentic selves. So just experiment, experiment with leaning into curiosity when you want to make a change. And just start small and slow and set clear intentions for what you want to gain from this change you want to make. Set that intention is your motivation. In my experience, and in my life, when we're able to turn down some of the noise to start to drown out some of those stories that we tell ourselves. It's easier to make changes and choices as our authentic selves. And then when we do that we can move from a place of self compassion and self love and start to release some of that fear surrounding change. Joe, thank you so much for spending time with me here on the podcast. If you enjoy if you're enjoying the podcast, please share it with a friend. Or leave us a review wherever you listen. And don't forget to subscribe so you don't miss any of the good stuff. And we'll see you next time.

Thank you for spending time with us on the sensitivity rising podcast. Please reach out to us with any questions or topic ideas you'd like to learn more about. New episodes are released Wednesdays and if you're enjoying the podcast, please take a moment to leave a review and share it with others. You can click the Listen link in the show notes to subscribe for free on your platform of choice. And we'll see you next time.

About the Podcast

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Sensitivity Rising
Where Highly Sensitive People learn to turn down the noise and tune into their inner guidance systems.

About your hosts

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Tonya Rothe

Tonya is a Certified Professional Holistic Wellness Guide, trauma survivor, depression thriver & Highly Sensitive joy seeker living in the Pacific Northwest, specializing in Sensitivity Focused Yoga & Nutrition for Body Mind Spirit.
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Daphnie Leigh

Daphnie is a Clinical Health Coach, Ayurvedic Lifestyle Coach, and an advanced yoga and mindfulness meditation teacher who specializes in helping highly sensitive people break free from anxiety while cultivating a peaceful mind and healthy body.